I'd like to discuss over my next few blog posts about the different kinds of abuse that are categorized as domestic violence. Domestic violence (DV) is not just hitting, slapping and punching as many are led to believe. DV assumes many other roles as well.
The type of abuse I'd like to talk about today is emotional abuse. Many victims of DV and many people in the community downplay the role that emotional abuse plays in the lives of its victims. Survivors of DV would tell you that they would rather be hit and slapped than be abused emotionally because physical scars heal faster than emotional ones.
Affects of emotional abuse can take years and even decades to heal, if they heal at all.
Let me clarify something: No one kind of abuse takes precedence over another or is worse than another...all forms of abuse are evil. The point I'm trying to make is that we must remember that many forms of abuse coexist together and cannot be isolated or put in proverbial boxes.
That being said, let's take a look at emotional abuse:
Do you think your partner is emotionally abusive? Use the checklist below to identify emotional abuse in your relationship. The more items you mark, the more emotionally abusive the relationship is.
Does your partner:
- Accuse you of things you have not done?
- Act jealous?
- Consistently ignore your feelings?
- Continually blame you for abusive incidents?
- Continually threaten to leave or divorce you?
- Criticize your race, culture, or gender?
- Degrade or humiliate you, your friends, or your family?
- Deny you the right to your own opinion?
- Embarrass or disgrace you?
- Insist that you particpate in acts against your convictions?
- Intentionally frighten you?
- Joke or make fun at your expense?
- Keep you isolated from friends or family?
- Lie consistently?
- Make fun of your beliefs or education?
- Monitor your actions or behavior?
- Neglect you?
- Prohibit friendships you desire?
- Prohibit your further education or personal growth?
- Prohibit or restrict your use of a car or other mutual resources?
- Refuse to talk to you?
- Scold or rebuke you?
- Subject you to reckless driving?
- Threaten suicide?
- Threaten to commit you to a mental hospital?
- Threaten to destroy your belongings?
- Threaten to harm your pets?
- Threaten to have affairs?
- Threaten to lock you out of the house?
- Threaten to make you leave your home?
- Threaten to report you to authorities?
- Threaten to take your children from you?
- Threaten to withhold money?
- Use weapons as a threat?
- Withhold approval or affection as punishment?
- Withhold counseling or therapy?